Comparing Scars

I'm sure you have probably noticed that I have posted a couple of pictures of my own scars, but I have also included one of my Mother's. While my scars will practically be non-existent in no time, my Mother's are over a year and a half old. It has been suggested that each person's body heals differently and therefore, scars differently. As you can see her scars are several shades darker than mine. They are also notably thicker than mine as well. It seems that for some strange reason her scars were placed above the crease, instead of directly in the crease. After the initial unveiling of my scars my Mom was extremely disappointed because up until this point she thought that her scars were the norm.

She then decided to call our family friend that had also had her procedure done with Dr. Galante. She told her how immaculately my scars were healing. Deb was not surprised, but could hear the disgust in my Mother's voice. What made it even worse was that she preceded to tell her that her scars resembled mine. This has made my Mom completely NUTS, she feels like it just isn't fair. I feel very badly for her... But, like she says it is not like anyone is going to see them, but it is the principle.

Deb suggested that my Mom had done too much right after her surgery and maybe this was the cause of her poor healing. Regardless, my Mom insists this isn't the case. She seems to think that the difference is where the incisions were made. I think I agree because I know I definitely was no saint post surgery and I healed wonderfully! We will never know the true reason behind this SCAR MADNESS, but there may be a lesson in all of this... To be on the safe side take it easy and listen to what the Doc says. Relax.

Jogging on the Treadmill

Woo Hoo! Yep, I did it. I completed a thirty-minute jog at a fat-burning pace for the first time post-operation. This was exhilarating because let me tell you how mundane walking can become. After seeing Dr. Galante on Monday he told me that I could begin increasing my cardio intensity. So naturally, I wasted no time. It was really scary though because I had no idea what to expect. I began by walking at a fast past and began to gradually increase my speed. As I began to jog my breasts began to bounce. This was a queer experience, I have never felt anything quite like it. I was in absolutely no pain, I guess I had no clue what to expect and it definitely was not this.

Since my range of motion has essentially been depleted for the last four weeks it was awkward moving my arms in that way. I felt excellent before, during, and after, but it surely took a few moments to warm up to what has been placed inside. Since my first jog I have completed several others and each time I have cranked up the intensity a tad. Since doing so, my overall flexibility has improved, I no longer feel so stiff.

Day to day living skills have also, seemed to improve. For example, I am no longer as careful when changing my clothes — I feel almost "Normal" again (or as normal as I will ever be). Only two weeks to go before the weight training begins! =)

Three Week Visit

I was excited to go to my appointment because I knew Dr. Galante would also be thrilled with my final outcome. It took me an hour to get there and my appointment lasted approximately ten minutes at most, but that was good news. I went in, he checked me out, and looked at my scars. I was nervous about what he would say because I had been bragging here on my blog, but I was right. Dr. Galante said they look FABULOUS. "You can barely see them!" That was music to my ears.

What I did mention was the fact that my left breast is still quite a bit higher than my right. He did not seem to notice a difference, but TRUST ME... I NOTICED. Dr. Galante, also being a perfectionist of sorts, wanted to make sure I was 100% satisfied. So what he did was take a photograph of me during my appointment of course to keep documentation, but mainly to compare my before and after shots. What he did was pull them up on his computer side by side and then with a highlighter (only on the computer) he underlined each nipple.

It was very strange. There was definitely a difference, but it was nothing to get frantic about. In fact I could barely see the difference anymore. I guess looking down at one's own breasts is quite a bit different than head on. The pictures also showed that before the procedure I was exactly the same, meaning my left breast was higher than my right. Dr. Galante explained that most women have asymmetrical breasts and that it was perfectly normal. That made me wonder, "What else are you blowing out of proportion?" In my mind there was a significant difference, but as it turns out that was a myth. Trust me, I am not disappointed. =)

Finally, The Reward!

After several weeks of discomfort and sacrifice I have finally reaped the benefits of this whole ordeal. I questioned whether or not I should have the procedure in the smack dab middle of the summer, but boy am I glad I did. I cannot imagine having gone through with this in the middle of January here in Chicago, yuck. I would have had to wait five months before I could even consider testing these "girls" out in a completely chic bathing suit.

At times it seemed I had forgotten the whole reason behind going through with all of this. But, today I no longer had any questions. For the first time ever I felt like I owned the bathing suit section. I was not intimidated by any suit and I made sure that I gave them all a shot. I no longer had to worry about the extra padding or how that too tiny top would make my breasts look even more miniature. I left the store with three LARGE new tops! You may think this is excessive shopping, but I just couldn't refrain. Before today I haven't bought a new suit in a couple of years. =( I just was never really enthused, it was a natural high to feel so good. It was amazing so to be able to buy any suit in the store I wanted. I highly recommend factoring the cost of new clothing and undergarments into the cost of one's procedure because it is way too much fun! Bye, Bye size small. HELLO Large! =)

Drum Roll, Please...

After surgery Dr. Galante covered both of my incisions (SCARS) with this clear tape-like stuff and said it would eventually come off. Well, this has been like complete torture for me because all I have wanted to do for the past three weeks was peel it off to see the damage. Like I had mentioned early on; I have been so fortunate my entire life to have never have needed stitches... So of course what do I do? I run out and create my own.

After my Mother had her surgery Dr. Galante said he was not pleased with the way her scars had healed. I'm not sure if this is due to the fact she did too much after her surgery or if that is just the way her scars healed. Her scars kind of look like some weird insect. They are raised above the skin and it appears that you can see exactly where each of the stitches were. Needless to say, I have been so anxious to see mine and I finally was able to peel the bandages off late last night.

Here's where the Drum Roll comes in... Ta da! They are Beautiful. I was picturing something similar to my Mom's, but they look nothing like hers. They are the tiniest lines that fall perfectly under each crease. The color is a very light shade of pink, which was also a pleasant surprise. I was expecting a purplish-pink color, but my scars are barely visible. Today having the tape off was a tad different because my bra was rubbing directly on each of the incisions. This caused them to be irritated and painful at the end of the day, but that is OK because they look so good! I see Dr. Galante Monday to see if he agrees, I'm pretty sure he will!

Bra-Less

My latest occurrence is that I no longer have to wear that surgical bra. Thank goodness. Dr. Galante told me that I must wear the bra that I was sent home in for two complete weeks; morning, noon, and ALL night. At the beginning it was definitely more comfy to have the bra on. But, as time went on all I wanted to do was get it off! So since Friday I have been wearing sports bras because I like the support. It would also be very uncomfortable on my incisions at this point to wear a regular one.

I look fantastic in these sports bras! Wow, that felt amazing to say. Just a few weeks ago I looked completely flat chested and now I am like, "You Go Girl." My breasts are no longer sore, but the incisions have taken over in the soreness department. I have moderately taken Advil to ease the soreness, but nothing major. One other bizarre thing is that my nipples have been extraordinarily dry. I think this may be caused by the tightness of the sports bras. I have been moisturizing them like crazy and this seems to have helped a little. I am getting anxious to begin my weights again, but every day is one step closer! Today is already day 18 — and that is crazy! =)

Situations

Today, I was out to lunch with a couple of colleagues and the kind hostess decided to seat us in a not so kind booth. This booth was the largest booth I had ever seen and of course there wasn't a ton of room to slide in. I blindly jumped right in! When doing so I was quickly reminded that I had just had a BREAST AUGMENTATION. I did this weird push-off-the-seat thing... OUCH! Not to mention that the people I was with have no clue about my surgery. It was very uncomfortable to say the least.

Just when you think things are all good, BAM! There it was, my friendly reminder. "Hello Sabrina, just in case you forgot about the healing process, we thought we would give you a quick shout out (from my breasts)." Well, let me just tell you I suffered the rest of the afternoon.

When you are in the flow of day-to-day life sometimes you forget you have to be careful. I felt good today, so obviously feeling good masks the recovery. It did not even occur to me that sliding into a booth at lunch would ultimately cause this kind of muscle soreness or pain. Just when I thought I was going to be able to start tossing around some weight, I got the message! Not so fast, Killer. =)

Strange Happenings

Since day one my left breast has been larger than my right breast. But, the stranger thing is that my right one has always been more sensitive. When I woke up in the recovery room after surgery I felt this bizarre pain in my right breast. It felt like a 30 pound brick was just hanging out on that side of my chest. As time has gone on the right side no longer feels as heavy or painful, but now it feels like my muscles around the implant are grabbing onto it tightly. When I take a deep breath it is especially noticable. My incisions are only really sore in the morning, as soon as I wake up. They just feel like any other laceration or open wound during the healing process. Now, the left breast looks a bit goofy. It is much larger than the right one. My Mom said the same thing happened to her, only the opposite breast. Her breasts are now the same size, so.... For now I'll just wait it out and hope she's right. Otherwise, I'll be a lopsided young woman. There are worse problems, aren't there?! Just Joking =)

Breaking Down

Yesterday was a tough one. I have not been able to get a complete night's rest in about five days. I have had so many thoughts running back and forth. For example, did I make the right decision in having this surgery, what was I thinking putting these foreign objects into my body, and was this choice made in vain?

Saturday night a large group of us went out for pizza, we had a fantastic time, but I was a tad distracted. I had to force myself several times to focus on the present moment. I was consumed with what was going on around me. I had placed myself at the center of every person that was present that night. I felt like they were all staring at me. Omi goodness, this girl must have been out of her mind! I felt like one of those girls that needed every ounce of attention I could possibly muster up. The truth is, sure people looked at me. I personally know this well. Considering I could watch people for hours on end (I find it fascinating). The emotional forthcoming was I'm sure due to my lack of sleep and my subconscious thoughts that perhaps had been ignored.

Thank the Lord above, because last night I got seven hours. Don't get me wrong it was not seven hours straight, but very overdue nonetheless. All of these questions have forced me to look at myself from the inside out. Some of these reflections are brilliant and others not so much. This procedure has forced me to look at myself in a much different light than I have in a very long time. To evaluate who I am and who I want to be. The shedding of these tears I know will make me a bit stronger in some way. It has also reminded me that I did this for me! It does not matter what anyone thinks because they do not truly know me anyway. After much deliberation I have come to the conclusion that I made my decision for all the right reasons. My peek inside has reminded me to always have faith in myself and my choices. It is almost as if a new chapter has opened and I am really looking forward to what it brings!

Can You Believe the Nerve

It seems like every other second my nipples are hard. Some I'm sure find this appealing, but I happen to find it to be somewhat bothersome and delightful in a peculiar way. It has been interesting comparing notes with my Mama. She said, after her procedure, the same thing was happening with her. The difference is... I can feel when this is happening and she could not! I have not decided which of the two I would choose, that is if I had a choice. The conservative side of me feels embarrassed... kind of like, look at me and my new Boobies! While my more relaxed side says... AWE Yeah, UR SEXY!

One thing I am positive about, is the fact that I can feel my nerves healing themselves. Underneath each nipple every now and again I get this very strange, but cool sensation. It reminds me of one of those little glass dome sensory lights. You know the ones that have all those different color lines shooting all over the place, but come from a core. I guess like a painless electrical charge. With each day they become more and more vibrant. It has only been nine days and the healing process is well under way. The human body is so amazing and fascinating it is essentially self-sufficient. It automatically knows what to do and where to do it. There is no wasting time with this machine and I love that! =) The faster the recovery the better!

Ouch!

Not being a very patient person, I thought I would test my limits. I woke early and since I had taken the entire week off of work I planned to take full advantage. I went to the gym first thing in the morning and did the hour of walking thing. That was great.

Then, I came home, cleaned up like a crazy woman, ran errands, and went to dinner. I felt like I had hit a MAJOR wall. I think my body was playing tricks on me because early on while walking I felt fantastic.

As the day went on I began to feel weak. My selective listening skills set in and I continued to ignore the signs my body was giving me. I began to feel a bit "Dazed and Confused," if you will. I needed to slow down... Hello, RELAX!

I stopped taking my medications on Sunday, but now I'm in a lot of pain. I did not resort to the meds, but I have decided to listen from now on. Long story short, listen to your body — it always lets us know when it has had enough. When it seems like I am back to normal, then I am suddenly reminded by the discomfort of opening that car door or sitting up too fast that I'm not alright. Just remember to relax — time heals all wounds! =)

Exercise Fanatic

Omi Gosh, today was the first day of no pain medications. So naturally I headed to the gym. Dr. Galante said I cannot do any intense cardio for at least four weeks and no weight training for at least six.

This caused a slight panic, but there is always a bright side to every situation. What Dr. Galante did say is that I could walk at a moderate level to my heart's content. That is exactly what I did — WALKED MY LITTLE BUTT OFF! I did one hour on the treadmill (equivalent to 6 miles). I kept my heart rate at the very low end of the fat burning zone, nice and steady. I felt great when I was through, in fact I could have gone longer... I was just afraid to over do it.

So that is my plan. I am going to walk like I never have, because if I don't I will go absolutely insane! I breathe for fitness and I think walking will fill my void in the upcoming weeks. I am actually really excited about it. One of my goals to meet before my next show is to trim a bit of muscle of my legs and all this walking is definitely going to help! So far this has been a really awesome experience, I am thankful for my choice.

The Big Day

It was Friday, June 30th at 9:30am and I had just arrived at Illiana Surgery center in Munster, IN. I felt as if I was almost removed from everything that was about to be happening. When I got there I was asked to check in and finalize my payment. At registration I would verify all of my personal information and my Mother was also present to sign that she would be driving me home after the procedure.

I waited a few moments and then was taken back into the outpatient prep room. I was first taken into a small locker room. Here I would change out of my own clothes into the surgical gown, robe, booties, and I would never forget to mention the hair cap. Let me tell you I was looking pretty HOT!

While waiting the nurses did all the prepping required for my surgery. They took my blood pressure, asked me a zillion questions in regards to my health or previous health issues. I sort of felt like I was signing my life away. Shortly after this the anesthesiologist came in and spoke with me, he also asked questions that were necessary before administering the anesthesia. Soon after, the nurses inserted my IV.

Since you are not allowed to have anything to eat or drink after midnight prior to your surgery, I was dehydrated and the nurses found it difficult to find a vein in my left hand. They finally hooked me up in my right hand and I was good to go. My parents were called in to see me off before I left for surgery. I remember seeing them for a brief period of time and the rest is history.

About two hours later I woke up with large swollen bumps on my chest that were very uncomfortable to say the least. I also had a terrible reaction to the anesthesia and my oxygenation levels were very low. I was given numerous breathing treatments to try and cure this problem. Prior to surgery I was at 100% and after I started in the mid-70s. This caused a bit of panic, but does not happen to everyone. People react differently to the treatment and therefore, makes it all the more important to honestly answer all the questions the doctors and nurses ask prior to your surgery.

No one in my family or myself had had a reaction to anesthesia, but sometimes one's body acts differently. My surgery began at about 11am and I was finally able to leave around 6pm. This is not typical, but possible depending on how each person handles the anesthesia.

Besides my personal difficulties, I had a wonderful team of Nurses and Doctors looking over me constantly, making sure that I was as comfortable as I could be. Even though this was a bit scary for a small time, Dr. Galante said he was positive that I would be fine and I believed him. Everything turned out beautifully and I am well on my way to recovery!